A Rom-Com Kind of Day...

I've actually been contemplating this post for awhile, composing thoughts in my head, which is never a good idea, by the way, because most of the time my mind is a jumbled mess. I blame it on the job...up at 5am every morning. Although I prefer to open so I can a) get it over with, and b) have the rest of the afternoon/evening to do what I want (sleep), after day 3 of early mornings, I'm pretty sure I look like a walking zombie. For instance, I have very little recollection of this morning, other than repeating the same prayer over and over in my head, but I digress.

Yesterday I decided instead of sleeping the afternoon away causing myself to not sleep well last night I would treat myself to a movie (or 2). It's a great alternative when you live some place that's reaching the 106 degree mark everyday. Free refills on soda and blasting AC. Not to mention that because of my wonderful connections, I have free movie passes (thanks, Sarah). I decided to make it a Rom-Com day. I started out in Friends With Benefits, which I had actually already seen and loved and then ended my movie marathon with Crazy, Stupid, Love. Now although there are certainly things I don't agree with about these movies, what I fell in love with were the heartfelt stories.

In FWB, you meet 2 emotionally damaged/unavailable 20-somethings who are done with love. So, after developing a solid friendship, they decide to try out this whole "friends with benefits" concept. I don't want to ruin the ending for you, but as you can probably guess, it only works out for a little while. But, what I appreciate about the relationship that's developed between Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis' characters is that they learn to really let their guards down and to truly be themselves. They don't just develop some Hollywood romance, they invest in one another and become best friends. Now it seems everything I've been reading and watching lately has been talking about this concept of marrying your best friend. For a long time, I would get really irritated when I would hear people gushing about this, but what that boils down to is me hanging onto hurt and disappointment from past relationships. I fell in love with my best friend in college. He didn't love me back. In fact, he didn't take care of my heart at all. When I became best friends with another guy in seminary, I found myself guarded at times, afraid of the outcome. Thankfully, he proved over and over again that he only wanted to protect my heart and he's still my best friend today. Did we fall in love? No. Do I still measure most guys I meet to him? Absolutely. So how does one end up marrying their best friend? Does it happen when two friends have this "aha" moment that they want to move past friends to lovers? The truth of the matter is that friendship is required for a relationship to really work. Attraction and passion ebb and flow, but it's the friendship that stands the test of time. (Now I sound like a cheesy Hallmark card). I've been reading Don Miller's latest blogs on relationships. (I borrowed the sweet photo above from him.) I suppose now that he's engaged he feels he can offer up his expertise on finding your soul mate. He offers some good insights. Specifically he talks about finding that person you're willing to run the marathon with. It's a good analogy, really. Marriage is a commitment that is supposed to last forever. It's not meant to be over as soon as things get rough. Unfortunately, we as women tend to get caught up in the fairytale romances that happen on the big screen, myself included, but what is often left out is what happens after the couple finally makes that big plunge into "happily ever after."

This brings me to Crazy, Stupid, Love. This is a movie more about seasoned love, with a few other emerging love stories in the background. It's one of those that has a surprise twist that leaves you laughing at the irony. Steve Carrell and Julianne Moore play the typical married couple who have grown apart after 25 years of marriage. Their lives have become mundane, so Emily, Julianne's character, sleeps with a coworker, then informs Cal, Steve's character, that she wants a divorce. Honestly, I don't think she really wants a divorce, I think she just wants to know that their marriage is still worth fighting for. From there we follow Steve's character as he tries to figure out where things went wrong. Along the way he meets Jacob, a womanizing, suave, very confident, very good-looking younger guy who wants to help him "find his manhood." This comes about in a variety of ways: new wardrobe, working out, learning how to talk to women, and then sleeping with them (not such a fan of that one). What he learns as this new life backfires on him is that the woman he fell in love with at the age of 13 is still the same woman he's in love with today. Their day-to-day life made him forget that just because she said yes years ago did not mean that he could stop pursuing her and proving to her everyday that she was worth fighting for. This is where that marathon analogy comes in. They both lost sight of what they had committed to. They lost their friendship. They stopped training and became lazy to the point of almost giving up and making poor decisions that leave them both even more hurt, more confused, and uncertain of their future. They come to a crossroads. Do they begin investing in each other and their family again or do they give up? You'll have to watch the movie to find out what they decide. Plus, those other love stories included in this movie that I mentioned earlier are highly entertaining.

Go see them. I would love to hear your thoughts.